Many of us are grappling with patterns and recurring issues that we don’t understand because we have unresolved fears we haven’t become conscious of yet. We store our fears, along with our emotional information and memory, in our subconscious minds. We often aren’t aware of our fears. We aren’t conscious of what they are, how they impact us, and how they’re manifesting in our lives. One of the most common fears many of us struggle with is a fear of abandonment.
We often fear abandonment because we’ve experienced it before in one way or another and we want to avoid feeling the pain that comes along with it. A parent may have left the family, or there may have been a divorce or separation. A close family member or friend may have passed away, and the painful loss made us feel abandoned. We may have been physically or emotionally neglected or abused, leaving us feeling abandoned. Our abandonment wasn’t necessarily in the literal sense, but something we experienced, such as a trauma, may have made us feel abandoned.
When we have a persistent fear of abandonment, it can color everything in our lives, including our relationships. We may be desperate for companionship and so afraid to be alone that we settle for relationships we’re unhappy with. We might stay in abusive or toxic relationships, subconsciously thinking that being with someone is inherently better than being alone. We might put up with very unhealthy treatment, avoiding the alternative of not having anyone.
Sometimes when we’re afraid of being abandoned, we cling to other people hoping their love or attention will make us feel better about ourselves. We might seek validation in the opinions of other people, and when we don’t receive it, we feel worse about ourselves. We might go to drastic measures to impress other people. We might transform our personality, appearance and behaviors to be the person we think our partner wants us to be. We can lose our sense of self entirely as we struggle to hold onto our concept of love. We associate being alone with loneliness, depression and pain, so we do everything we can to avoid having to be alone.
Learning how to heal from our fears starts with becoming more conscious of them and how they’re showing up in our lives.
Our comprehensive treatment programs are designed to help you heal from all the unresolved issues contributing to your addiction, including your fears. You may have been afraid to share your fears before, but we’re here to support you in the process. Call us today for more information: 888-570-7154